Guilty…on Grandparents’ Day

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It’s Grandparents’ Day, the time of year where we are thankful for the extra people in our life or our kids’ lives.   My parents are absolutely amazing grandparents and I don’t know what we’d do without them.  But this holiday actually makes me feel guiltier each year.

Don’t get me wrong.

My extended family on both sides is amazing.   We love each other and actually genuinely like each other.   We get together for all holidays, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc.    I am beyond blessed to still have all four grandparents alive in their mid-high 80’s.  All FOUR! 

So where is the guilt coming in?

I feel more and more guilt every year that I don’t spend more time with my aging grandparents.  I know they both have a lot of kids and grandkids and great-grandkids but I am SO burdened with the feelings that I don’t spend enough time with them.  I just know I don’t.

I want to see them and spend time with them. I want to visit with them and hear their stories (even if it’s for the 5th or 6th time).  I want to keep them company and break up their days of being home.  I want them to know my kids.   I just don’t carve the time into our family schedule like I ought to.  They are local so I have no excuse with distance.

I’m guessing I’m not alone.  I’m in the craziness of having little ones, working full-time and trying to stay sane phase of life.   Then we’ll move into the craziness of kids in activities, working full-time and trying to stay sane phase of life, so I know having “free time” won’t improve.    We do TONS of things with family, it just usually isn’t always with my grandparents.

If you are in the same boat as I am, maybe these things will help you make some resolutions this Grandparents’ Day (like I am) to get better at this.

Put it on the Calendar

I am going to begin actually writing it in on our calendar – just like swimming lessons, tots football camp and doctor’s appointments. “Visit Grandpa & Grandma” is going to be written down.  I actually keep my time spent with the things written down so I know this will help.  It might seem silly to schedule this, but if it works for you, do it!

Embrace Modern Technology

My almost 85 year old Grandma is on Facebook. And regularly checks it!   She writes in every card that she loves watching the kids on Facebook, which usually leads to guilt that she sees them more that way than in person.  But I need to not feel guilty about that. I need to be glad that she is able to see my kids more regularly.  I need to embrace that she and my grandpa know how to Skype and use it more often if we can’t actually go there in person or when they winter in Florida.   So if your grandparents are with the modern tech times, enjoy it and use it! Or teach them how!

Now I know this doesn’t fit all grandparents. My grandpa on the other side of the family will use his landline the least amount of time as possible.  He calls, states what he needs, and is off.  And that’s ok.  I just know I need to see him in person instead.

Do the Same Thing, Just With Them

If we were going to spend our Sunday afternoon playing baseball in the back yard, bring it to their house.  We are capable of packing the equipment up and setting up the field so they can watch and enjoy the kids, too.  Or invite them along for Friday fish or to watch the t-ball game!   I don’t think about including them as much as I should because my kids spend so much time with their grandparents.  It’s a blessing that they can know their great-grandparents, too!

So on this Grandparents’ Day, enjoy your grandparents.  Call or see them and tell them that you love them.  And work on that guilt.  As moms, we get guilty about so many aspects of our life and that we aren’t doing well enough in them.  Let’s take this one off of our plates.

 

 

 

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Stephanie
Stephanie was born and raised in the Green Bay area. After meeting her husband Tom at UWSP while earning a degree in elementary education, they returned to the area to start their family and careers. Stephanie has been blessed with two outgoing and entertaining children - Landon and Ava. Teaching third grade keeps her plenty busy during the school year but she couldn’t imagine doing anything else! When she’s not at school, Stephanie loves to read, cook (and pretend to be a Masterchef), spend time in Door Co with family and craft/DIY. Her favorite thing in the world is to take her kids to free adventures all around town (or find a great deal while shopping her with her mom!) Literacy is a true passion of Stephanie’s which inspired her to also start her own business with Usborne Books & More!